A reader (he signs as Booker Tee) has sent me two letters, but the second request I think should be dealt with first. Here is his email.
Hi Red:
I also have a problem with finding the courage to ask for a spanking.
I know I need one, but I'm afraid to ask.
Or if we get into an argument, which would end quickly if I would ask for it, but then I'm stubborn or mad, and the last thing I want is to submit.
She is mostly vanilla; once in a while she's asked me if I need/want a spanking, and I always say no, even though it's exactly what I need.
We haven't established any agreement about spanking, which sounds like a good idea.
How do I start that?
I'd like to take our relationship to consensual spanking like you've described, but I'm afraid to bring it up, and I'm afraid to let her spank me anyway. Got any advice?
signed Booker Tee
Aside; The other email is about how to stay in position while being spanked, and not getting up or wimping out (his words), but let us just deal with the request at the top.
I would like my readers to explain how they started in a spanking lifestyle!
My suggestions:
1. You must understand that spankings hurt! That is the purpose of a spanking. However, they are spankings, not brutality, and an agreement on the severity must be discussed with both participants before beginning.
2. You need to talk to your partner, and express your desires openly. A good starting point is to visit the website http://auntkaysdwc.com/abegin.htm
and read both the club PURPOSE, and the tips and methods. This is what I had Cindy do after discussing with her a bit about my desires. Cindy does NOT do the strong discipline that aunt Kay suggests, but we do not do bruising, and without any tears or weak knees when standing. Cindy would want no part of that.
3. I ordered some books from Aunt Kay, that also helped convince both of us to try this in our relationship, and it has been successful.
Talk, talk, talk, and be willing to bare your bottom
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whenever it is suggested,
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or demanded!!!
bottoms up
Red
Hi Red:
I also have a problem with finding the courage to ask for a spanking.
I know I need one, but I'm afraid to ask.
Or if we get into an argument, which would end quickly if I would ask for it, but then I'm stubborn or mad, and the last thing I want is to submit.
She is mostly vanilla; once in a while she's asked me if I need/want a spanking, and I always say no, even though it's exactly what I need.
We haven't established any agreement about spanking, which sounds like a good idea.
How do I start that?
I'd like to take our relationship to consensual spanking like you've described, but I'm afraid to bring it up, and I'm afraid to let her spank me anyway. Got any advice?
signed Booker Tee
Aside; The other email is about how to stay in position while being spanked, and not getting up or wimping out (his words), but let us just deal with the request at the top.
I would like my readers to explain how they started in a spanking lifestyle!
My suggestions:
1. You must understand that spankings hurt! That is the purpose of a spanking. However, they are spankings, not brutality, and an agreement on the severity must be discussed with both participants before beginning.
2. You need to talk to your partner, and express your desires openly. A good starting point is to visit the website http://auntkaysdwc.com/abegin.htm
and read both the club PURPOSE, and the tips and methods. This is what I had Cindy do after discussing with her a bit about my desires. Cindy does NOT do the strong discipline that aunt Kay suggests, but we do not do bruising, and without any tears or weak knees when standing. Cindy would want no part of that.
3. I ordered some books from Aunt Kay, that also helped convince both of us to try this in our relationship, and it has been successful.
Talk, talk, talk, and be willing to bare your bottom
bottoms up
Red